One of the few things that I have yet to let go of from "childhood" or rather, things I didn't get rid of right after high school when I had to grow up for realsies is: church. I stayed in my home ward and served in the nursery. They put me in the Sunday before I graduated, and I stayed there. At first, it was totally chill and I loved being in Nursery, but then, after a while, I started feeling incredibly stagnant, spiritually. I kept reasoning with myself that **if they ever released me from Nursery, I would finally go to Single's Ward. And **if I ever got a car, I would go to Single's Ward, so I didn't have to borrow my parent's cars (how LAME).
**keep this phrase in mind
Well, it was one of the things I've been so hecka frustrated about lately, and I finally decided to just DO IT. Nursery could survive without me, they would find another person/couple and get over it.
Then, I went to the temple last night, and my decision was confirmed there.
Then, I came to church this morning with the intent of telling the Bishop and moving my records after church.
As I was sitting there in the chapel with my mom (who had irritated me and told me to wait until after church) my dad was chatting with the bishop and looked at me with one of his looks. My first instinct was "No, I will not give the opening prayer, Dad." That wasn't it at ALL. He came down to our bench and told me that they were releasing me from Nursery. Serious? Remember those phrases I told you to remember? That was one of them. I would go if they ever released me from Nursery. Another confirmation to my decision. And I have a car now... so... I really had zero excuses left.
I wasn't feeling ALL that well today, and I went to the bathroom inbetween first and second hour trying to decide if I even wanted to stay. Well, the bishop was just chillin' in his office and one of the ward clerk humans was there and I popped my head in and told the bishop that I was planning on going to the Single's Ward anyway, so it was really convenient that he released me today and I wanted to move my records. The clerk was all kinds of helpful and he was like, Oh, yeah! We can totally do that right this second. So, I met my mom in Gospel Doctrine with my records already moved to my new ward. And then I had a lesson from one of my favorite humans in the ward. Him and his wife are literally, my favorite. I love them to death, and coincidentally, this was their probable last week in the ward too, because they're moving to Lehi. Well, his wife was in there too, and at the end of his lesson, it really hit me. I was leaving this ward. I would now be going to church by myself. With a bunch of people I don't know. And it was a little bit scary. Good thing I couldn't back out now, right? Well, I lost it. And I lost it because I didn't want to say goodbye to the Stinson's. And it was all happening at the same time, and it was ridiculous. But, we cried it out, chatted with another woman in the ward in the hallway until halfway through Relief Society, then listened to the last little bit of the lesson. Which, was really good, surprisingly. I don't have the best opinion of Relief Society, I think it's yucky and for old/married people who have husbands and kids. But, this was a good note to end on in the 6th ward.
Everyone kept asking me if I was moving on to bigger and better things all day, and I really think I am. Single's Ward is where I'm meant to be right now, and it's one of the strongest (positive) feelings I've had in a LOOOOONG time. Don't get me wrong, I'm still FREAKING OUT. But, in a good, moving on with my life, kind of way.
I'm going to the Single's Ward.
I hope you all have a lovely Sunday night, I'm off to celebrate my Momma's 51st Birthday (don't tell her I told you how old she is...) and wait with crazy anticipation for finding out the gender of Baby Guppy tomorrow!!! (Baby Guppy is what I use to refer to my sister-in-law's growing baby bump. That's what I'll call it whether boy or girl.)
Also, I've been referring to it as the Single's Ward... but is it "Single's Ward" or Singles Ward? I feel more like it's "Singles Ward", without the apostrophe. Any thoughts?