Monday, February 11, 2013

If I should die before I wake...

"No funeral, no open casket viewing. No long winded 'memorial'." 

My grandma Lou died yesterday morning and she had written down what she wanted done with herself. It's a really weird concept for most of my family, as they feel like there's no "closure". Personally, I'm not sad, I haven't cried, I'm actually just fine. Not because I'm heartless, but because it was definitely her time. She's been a shell of a human for the past three or four months, not being able to stay awake or ANYTHING. Anyway, I thought this paragraph was beautiful:

"I arranged for cremation, scatter ashes somewhere pretty, do not cart them back to Utah for burial. And, as my husband, your father said: "No mourning over a grave, I won't be there, just 'think me a field of flowers'."

It seems weird, the concept of being cremated, for most people. At least, it does if you grew up in Utah. I personally really like what she's decided. It's SO her. It melds perfectly with her personality. But I also see why it's so weird for everyone else. 

But, I'm not sad. In fact, I'm really happy for her. She lost the love of her life when she was 20 years old, barely enough time to fall in love. He was gone with the Army most of the time, so that was hard. They had four kids together, two sets of twins, and while Lou was pregnant with the second set, they were in a car accident that killed only him. My grandma lost the love of her life and ended up with four kids that were all under the age of three in one day. She had to live with that grief for her entire life, and the last few years she had pretty poor quality of life. 

I'm happy for her, because she's finally back with her sweetheart. She's no longer in pain. She'll finally see the light. 

'Til we meet again, Grandma. I'll think you a field of flowers. 

Have a lovely day, I hope I didn't depress any of you. 

     Reille K. 

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