Sunday, December 30, 2012

More temple adventures and a Sunday thought.

Sooooo, once upon a yesterday, Danielle and I went to the Draper temple and did baptisms for the dead. We've made it our thing to go somewhere OTHER than the Timpanogos temple. Not that the Timpanogos temple isn't great, but it's cray busy. Always. Plus, it's a nice, refreshing change to go somewhere else. 

We began our journey at the gas station. I had enough gas, but I can guarantee that we always get lost. We never get directions beforehand. Getting lost and finally finding the temple just adds to the adventure! And it's a nice little accidental metaphor. Think about it. :) Anyway... 

We only got a little lost... and we only made it slightly more complicated than it needed to be. We just took a few wrong turns, and had to flip a few u-turns. It's fine, we made it there. And per usual, they gave me the wrong size of jumpsuit. YES, I AM SURE I WANT AN XL. IT'S THE SAME SIZE I WEAR EVERY TIME I GO. Not to be rude or mean or whatever. The temple workers are great. But, I was sure. Not the point... We changed and had to be directed every which way every five seconds, but it was still really nice. We sat in the chapel looking into the font while these two girls did about a million and a half family names, and I felt so peaceful and great. Which was a nice change from this last week. 

We eventually made our way through all the steps and into the font, and the guy who baptized us said, "Thank you for coming tonight, Sister, you could be out having fun but you're here making people happy." Adorable. It was only about 6 pm, and we did do things afterwards, but it was still super cute. 

We were driving home and Danielle informed me she had never been to Ikea, so we made that happen. We got lost in there as well. Spent a good two hours there. Delicious chocolate, by the way. It's definitely going to be a staple purchase every time I go there, even though I don't go there very often. 

We spent the rest of the night eating dinner and spending time with some girls from high school. I had never actually hung out with any of them before, but I had a really great time. Even though we kinda crashed their night (sorry... kind of). Overall, it was a really good evening, even though my bestie moved away. :)

Sunday thought

Today, our speakers in Sacrament spoke on The Atonement. Now, to me, this subject seems like one of the most basic principles of the gospel. It also seems to be one that a lot of people either don't really understand and/or utilize. 

The speaker mentioned how Jesus chose to suffer for all our pains, afflictions, sickness, sorrows-- all the goods, bads, and uglies in each and every human's life that received a body on this earth. He chose to bear the pain of every child birth ever, he chose the pain of every person getting their wisdom teeth out, he chose to go through chemotherapy with every person that needs it. He chose all the broken bones, burns, cuts, period cramps, torn ligaments, scraped knees, stubbed toes. He chose all the break-ups, deaths of loved ones, failed tests, yelling in frustration at life, sorrows and turmoils of Every. Single. Person. that has EVER walked this earth. Ever. He chose all of that, FOR US. He suffered the pains and afflictions and sorrows for everyone-- past, present, and future. Have you ever thought of the magnitude of that? Because that is a hecka ton of people. 

Anyway, I hope all of you have a lovely Sunday, whether of the religious type or not. :)

Cheers, 
        Reille K. 

Thursday, December 27, 2012

It's been rough.

It's been a rough couple of days, guys. I mean, it was Christmas and all, which was good. And I was fine with my wisdom teeth until I woke up this morning having gone three hours without any pain meds. That super sucked. But I'm not talking about that stuff right now.

I'm talking about my dog. He's pretty old, around 13 years old in human years. We got him the February of 2000, which was when I was in Kindergarten. So this dog has been around for the majority of my life. His name is Brinkley, and he's a mutt. The cutest mutt you've ever seen, mind you. He's a German Shorthair Pointer mixed with a Healer. He looks like a German Shorthair, but has the legs and ribcage of a Healer.



He's been pretty sick for about a week, probably even longer. And the past few days, he's just completely fallen apart. He can't walk by himself anymore, he's not eating or drinking. He won't even wag his tail or give kisses. And as much as it breaks our hearts, we're putting him down tomorrow at 2:15. It'll definitely be one of the worst days ever tomorrow. It's the anniversary of my Grandpa's death, and I'm saying my farewells to Clayton, and my final goodbyes to the best dog ever. December 28th is just, a really rough day.  

And since I just can't think of anything else to say right now, plus the fact that I can barely see the screen through my tears, here are a bunch of my favorite pictures of Brinkley. 














The last six are from the last day or two and you can tell he's just not all there anymore. He's tired. 

And I don't know what Fritz is going to do without him. They're best friends. 



I sure am gonna miss that guy. Tomorrow's gonna be rough. 

**Luckily, he didn't even make it to the vet. He died this morning sometime between 5-7 AM. Which I prefer, actually. Since he died in the safety of his own home, without being at some random vets office, all scared and confused. He went peacefully and it was definitely his time. Not the BEST thing to wake up to, but I think I knew it was going to happen. I couldn't fall asleep last night, and I wish I would have slept on the floor next to him. We haven't figured out what to do with his body yet, so he's in the garage, wrapped up in his blanket. I went out to see him, because I felt like I needed to. I needed to see him so my brain didn't continue thinking, "Oh, he's just outside. He'll want to come inside in a bit." The house definitely feels emptier without him. He was the greatest dog, and I already miss him terribly. But it's not the last time I'll see him. Heaven wouldn't be heaven if Brinkley weren't there. 

Word to the Wisdom

Since I was an idiot, and didn't just wake up at 5:30, take my plethora of drugs, then go back to sleep, I'm now in quite a bit of pain instead of the tolerable level that I managed yesterday. Word to the Wisdom, STAY DRUGGED AT ALL TIMES. But, since I have to wait until my meds kick in a little more, you guys get to hear about a few things I said when I came out of the anesthesia. Since my mom didn't record it.


  • There was a spider in the recovery room, on the wall opposite me. And if I'm recalling correctly, that sucker was pretty big. I told my mom that he was gonna have a million babies in that room and they were all gonna get her. And then I talked about how no one even likes spiders, so how can it have babies?
  • I looked at the ceiling and counted the tiles. There were only eight, and in my drugged up brain, they looked to be about 12"x12" which is only one square foot! What a tiny little room! It was just, teeny tiny!
  • There was some kind of contraption on the wall, still don't know what it was, but I looked at it and I was like, "Mom! Is this a flashlight?! Why do they have a flashlight, it's not dark."
  • The nurse turned my jacket sleeve inside out instead of right side out, and I just took it from her and said, "I got it, I got it." Which, I did, by the way. 
  • Then she gave me a little ice pack that IS really small. And I just looked at it and said, "Ohh, look at this little baby guy. He's so cute! But couldn't I just stick my whole face in the snow and get it all done at the same time?" 
  • My whole mouth was bloody, so I kept telling people that I was a vampire and just ate someone. That was a gem. 
  • And I also told both my parents, when they said they were tired, that I just took a drug sleep. And one drug sleep equals 12 bajillion normal sleeps. So I wasn't tired at all! (Except that I came home and after going pee, which I did about once an hour yesterday, not cool, I went straight back to sleep.)
So, all in all, I really wish I would have made my mom film it. It doesn't seem quite as funny in text, but I would have been a YouTube sensation! Also, since I'm sure you're all wondering, I'm not even puffy. Maybe a little bit, but not enough to really notice. But the pain is pretty bad. Much more than I was expecting. I also wasn't expecting them to cut down the SIDES of my gums either. But I guess that's what I get for having roots that go all the way to China in my mouth. 

Hope everyone had a good Christmas! 

Cheers, 
      Reille K. 

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

"If you give me swine flu...

 I will kill you." Those were the words that began my greatest friendship, possibly of all time. I'm not sure exactly how or when Clayton and I became best friends, but that's what we are. And I sure am glad it happened. He's moving this week, and I think in my head I've tried to suppress all the anxiety and sadness that comes along with it. But we exchanged our Christmas presents on Saturday and it finally hit me. He wrote me a letter thanking me for my friendship and all the sentimental junk that I'll miss so much. Not that we will no longer be friends or grow apart (I would NEVER let that happen)when he moves... but it will be much longer between those late night talks, staring out over the valley for hours, and being completely ridiculous together. And I'll miss that. We talked about treasuring every moment that night, and I really do. I treasure every moment of our friendship.

Pictures? There aren't very many, but I think yes. :) 




Pretty sure we subconsciously refused to take a perfect picture on my camera at graduation... 


Then this happened... we ended up going to Denny's like this, and we were the coolest ones there. ;) "Would you like some lemonade, hot chocolate... some milk?" You can also see the blanket I made for him last Christmas on the right there. It's gigantic and super warm. You're welcome.:) Do you see what I mean by acting ridiculous together? 




And this year, Clayton gave me a pillow with a pillowcase that he made. And I love it! It's blue and covered with different colored whales... which you can see in the pictures... And it's so fluffy, I could die! Look at it! that's my hand, which, my hands are a little small, but it's like two of them! And since whales are his favorite, it'll be a good reminder of him every single day. Not that the pillowpet he gave me... two years ago? isn't already, his name is Charles :). In case you haven't noticed, we have a thing for bedding and aquatic animals when it comes to presents. And I love it! 

I sure am going to miss him. But I'm gonna go down and visit him in May. And he'll probably be up here semi-often. But just knowing that he isn't less than five minutes away, just right up 1600 North... that'll be hard. 



But I was my super dorky self and as part of his Christmas present, I got us bestie keychains that look like that ^ up there. Cute, right? I have always loved myself a compass rose. And I told him, "no matter how far apart we are physically, we'll always find our way back to each other." (not in those exact words, because I didn't want to cry, which I was so close to). And it's true. He's the best friend I've ever had. He's loved me unconditionally, even when I didn't deserve it. I haven't always been the mostly lovey dovey dork face that I am, and he's definitely helped me get there. He's shown me that I AM capable of being loved, because I haven't always been so sure of that. He's a constant reminder that my weirdness is what makes me who I am, and that it's completely fine to be that way. Normal, even. We've helped each other through countless problems, issues, emotions, and I couldn't have asked for a better friend.            He's exactly what I didn't know I needed in a best friend.
And I'm so thankful for that. 

This is also my 100th blog post! And I don't think I could have picked a better topic than my bestie. Both Clayton and my blog are really important to me, and I love it when those two things come together in any way. So yay for 100 posts! 

Monday, December 24, 2012

Merry Christmas Eve, y'all!

I have to work tonight... that will be interesting. But at least the store is closing at 9:00pm! And our executives are going to try their best to get us out as close to 9 as they can. It'll really just be a matter of guests that won't get out. So if you happen to be at Target tonight when we close... please leave as super quick as you can! So we can get home to our families. :) 

Also, this is my 99th blog post, and I already have the 100th one basically done. It'll be a good one! Obviously it's about Clayton... :) I'll explain why that's an obvious topic in the other post. 

And, *drum roll* I'm getting my wisdom teethies out the day after tomorrow! 8 AM SHARP. AHHHHHH! I'm so ready for this. I'm ready for the week or so of pain. I'm ready to not have to worry about how quickly I'm chewing so as not to cut the insides of my cheeks. The week or so of pain is going to be so worth it. Also, I'm sick of trying to floss back there and keep things really clean, because if I don't then I could develop a cavity and lose one of my permanent back molars! And I don't need none of that! 

Also, one more sleep until Christmas! I have been suppressing the crap out of how excited I am for Meg's present. I've been told it's Harry Potter themed... and we all know how much I love that. But, the excitement is coming out. And, we're also going to see Les Mis tomorrow night, and WOOOOOO am I excited! Gahh! I love me some Hugh Jackman. Did you know they're making another Wolverine movie? Oh man, I found out at work one night and I'm pretty sure a lot of the newer people think I'm certifiably crazy now. it's cool, I kind of am. 

Eeeeeeeee! 

Merry Christmas everyone! 

Thursday, December 20, 2012

this girl be cray.

... I never remembered what I WAS going to post about. Still annoyed, but whatever.

I've been a smidge absent as of late. Not so many multiple late-night blog posts every single night or anything.

But I've been BUSY. This week alone... Between last sunday and Christmas, I have today off. Not even Sunday this week. Because...

 I'm getting my wisdom teeth out the day after Christmas! And then I have four days in a row off!

*happy dance, happy dance*

Now, I know what you're all thinking, "This girl be cray".

In which case, you're completely right.

But not because of the wisdom teeth. ;)

I would show you my x-ray and junk but I seem to have misplaced the little bugger...

Anyway, the two on the bottom are IN MY MOUTH. Not lying dormant inside my gums and being good little teethies. No. They are sharp and mean and cut the insides of my cheeks when I eat and talk and chew gum (which is really kind of a lot). And they just irritate the butter out of me.

Plus, I don't think it's going to be that bad. And I hope that I can convince my mom to record me being ridiculous,  if only so I myself can see it. Because, I can already tell you, it'll be hilarious. Yesterday I was tired beyond all reason and I could barely talk by the end of my shift.

I'm also really excited for...

Les Miserables! Christmas night. 10:10 pm. It'll be amazing. I already know I'm going to love it. Know why? Because I freaking love Hugh Jackman. He's fantastic. "He's a fox." And his voice? Augh, to die for. And I know he's going to look crusty and gross for part of it. And I don't even care. I'll love him even then. 5 more days. :)

Sunday, December 16, 2012

great.

I just got really super duper annoyed. Because I had a post that I was going to write and I got onto blogger and then I saw and read a post from someone else and had to make dinner and find noodles and just *distractions*. And I completely forgot what I was going to write about. And I'm now very upset about it. I'll let you know if I ever in my life remember what it was. Uuggggggghhhhhhhhuh. I hate when this happens. I wish I could rewind my thoughts like a VHS tape!!!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

from inside the bubble...

it never seemed like we were really all that close. I'm always surprised, even after it's been this long, that people are shocked that we are no longer friends. I guess everyone thought we were the closest, and shared all our secrets, and were really the best of friends...

but we never were.

I'm surprised it even lasted that long, to be honest. It was a long time coming.

I read what I wrote about us in my smashbook at the beginning of the summer, and none of it is true, in the long run.

Which makes me think that with some things, nothing is ever really true.

And that thought makes me really sad.

I thought we would be friends forever.

I thought our kids would be best friends.

It's just so weird that it felt so real while it was happening, but it was really all so fake.

Fake.

I still can't believe how superficial our relationship really was.

I still wonder how she's doing.

Especially when people ask me as if I would obviously know, when I basically haven't talked to her since graduation. That's what really gets me going. Then I start missing her and missing all the good times, forgetting the awful times. The repressed feelings times. The not-being-able-to-be-myself times in fear that she would start disliking me for being who I am.

It wasn't until much later in the relationship, towards the end, on the downward slope that I even noticed. And then I hated myself for allowing that to happen in my life. I hated myself for a good year before I put a stop to it. I decided that I didn't want to be that person anymore, so I stopped. Right then. And though the times are still hard and life gets me down sometimes, I don't think I've ever been happier.

It's still weird that people still see us as a package deal. It's been so long.

Sorry for the downer post, but until next time...

Cheers,
       Reille K.


P.S. I'm getting my wisdom teeth out the day after Christmas. I'll try my best to document it all for you guys. I might even be able to convince my mother to record it. Wouldn't that be a gem?!

P.P.S. I just bought tickets to go see Les Miserables at 10pm on Christmas. And I'm going to cry my eyes out. And I'm going to absolutely love it. I can barely even watch the trailers without losing it. And I think it'll be JUST what I need.

P.P.P.S. Do you know what P.S. stands for? and why you repeat the 'P' instead of the 'S'? It stands for 'Post Script'. So if you add another, it's 'Post Post Script' and so on, rather than 'Post Script Script', because that just makes no sense. You're welcome, for the... English lesson. Also, the three periods '...' is called an ellipses. So use it correctly and always put three. Not two. Not four. Not five. Get it right, humans. :)

K, bye for reals.

Friday, December 14, 2012

alonely.

I find that when I'm surrounded by people, but they don't happen to be the *right* people, I feel like the loneliest hoodrat in the world. 

I find that there are times when ALL I want is to be alone.

I find that those times are never at the same time. And it's really inconvenient. 

So for now, I suppose I'll just peruse Pinterest and sit here bein' all alonely. 

For those of you who have plans on this rainy friday night, have fun! 

For those of you who have plans to do NOTHING on this rainy friday night, still have fun. :)

Cheers, 
       Reille K. 

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

just call me quirksy.

I've done one of these before... kind of. But for some reason, I've felt the need to tell you guys about this every time I do it lately (which is, at the very least, once a day. Sometimes more).

Every time I open an Internet window, I have THREE tabs.

The first tab- Facebook. Even if I JUST checked facebook on my phone (which is almost always the case) I have to do it. I don't always look at it again right away, but I go back to it later.

The second tab- First, I check my emails real quick then come here! To my blog! And I check to see if anyone has left any comments and read any new posts from blogs I follow and all that lovely stuff. Then I write a new post if I feel so inclined.

The third tab- Pinterest. Always. I spend forever and a day on there for a while and check facebook every so often (mostly when I notice that I have a notification) and just feel so worthless because I'm not creative. Jusssssssst kidding, I'm a pretty creative lassy. I just... sometimes have the skill level of a wombat when I'm trying to make something really cute/pretty/mostly presentable. And then when I'm doing something I don't really care all that much about, it's like I'm freaking Martha Stewart. *sigh* Se la vie.



Other quirks...

I'm really paranoid about tea and which ones I can drink without breaking the word of wisdom ... so I just don't. Ever. At all.

I always put my left sock and shoe on, then my right. Not sure why, it's what I've always done.

I ALWAYS have Blistex Medicated Mint Chapstick with me. At all times. One time I didn't and I hated myself. I made the person I was with go to a makeup store so I could "test" some lipgloss or something.

On Thanksgiving, I eat my turkey with whipped cream on it. Every year. And people think that's absolutely disgusting. Well, it's not. It's freaking delish. Salty sweet, homes. Try it. Also, olives and whipped cream. Yumtastic.

Well, I've run out of readily available quirks in my brain, and I need to go pick up my sister because we're hanging out. So... I'll do another one of these real soon. Maybe. Until then...

Cheers!
       Reille K.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Oh, Tor.

Once upon a time, in Mr. Saxton's 11th grade english class, I got sat next to Tori. I had ALWAYS seen her as the really popular cheerleader girl who I found really annoying. But... I had never really talked to her.

At first, it was excruciating to come in from lunch every other day to "Oh my gosh, Hi Reille!" And her never ending enthusiasm and perkiness. But I think it only took her about a week or maybe two for her to wiggle her way into my heart.

She was one of the first people to just give me a nickname and always call me that. She's one of the few people to call me 'Rei' and she always calls me 'Reille K!' always said in exclamation. She unconditionally loves me and I still am baffled that we are friends. I was such a beast to her. Almost always.

All through high school, I suppressed just how much I liked her. I suppressed the urge to hang out with her and be actual friends rather than just the friends that were friends in that one class and occasionally greeted each other in the hallways. BECAUSE. Of Chelsea. Chelsea didn't like Tori, she never gave her a chance, she thought she was an idiot cheerleader, blah blah blah. And I still kind of hate myself for not standing up for Tori when Chelsea would put her down. I just went along with it, because I thought that Chelsea and I would be friends forever. And I hate that I let her dictate my choice in friends even without her saying anything specific...

But then... I changed.

I "broke up" with Chelsea and moved on with my life, and I took a chance and wrote Tori a letter. And I told her all about this. And she wrote back and wasn't offended or weirded out or anything. She was excited! (obviously, it's Tori :]) And now we're pen pals and I just LOVE it. I love being friends with her. I love hearing about her life. I love her wanting to hear about mine. It feels like a real friendship. And I just love it.

She has been such a blessing.

A blessing in disguise.

A letter from her always brightens my whole week.

I love this girl. So so much.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Hauntingly Beautiful

I have been seeing this quote everywhere the past few days... pretty sure it's all Tiffanie Allen (facebook and her blog). And I absolutely love it. Enjoy!

"He looked at her in a way he had never looked at her before. He looked at her in a way he had never looked at anyone before. He saw her; truly saw her. Saw her for everything she was and is and would someday be. He realized then that he loved her; he loved her like the world was beginning and ending all at once. But he could never have her. It was too late, all too late. In a brilliant and agonizing second, his heart filled with the most inexplicable joy and then burst into a thousand pieces, filling his chest with the piercing shrapnel of a broken heart.”
- Anonymous

I find it hauntingly beautiful. The most glorious and saddest things I've ever heard. 

Friday, December 7, 2012

Not annoyed, LIVID.

Alright. There are a LOT of nice people in this world. A lot. And working in retail I see plenty of nice people.

But.

There are also RUDE people.

Lot's of them.

And usually I don't have much of a reaction, because that's just how people are. They can be rude, it's life.

But today.

I usually just think, oh okay, whatever. Sorry I offered to help you find something. And I go on with my day.

NO BIG DEAL.

But today.

My grandma was driving in the Target parking lot and the same person cut her off TWICE. Whilst speeding, might I add.

Then, she stopped for people to walk across the crosswalk and she waved this lady to go and she got mad! She told her to just go and looked ANGRY because of my grandma's niceness.

At that moment, I don't know what came over me, but I was LIVID. I was livid that people can't just BE NICE. I was livid that people don't just accept kindness. I was livid that people can act that way towards strangers.

I'm just... not cool with rudeness today. Not cool with it.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

it's never been my thing...

I've never seen it. I've never seen myself as "a great writer". I still don't really see it. I suppose it just happened that way because I read so much. I have seen so many stories develop so I guess that's just the way I put my own thoughts together. 

I'm more surprised than anyone else that people like my blog. I really am. I never expected a lot of people to read it, enjoy it, even know about it. But, this little baby has gone through a lot with me. We've grown together. We've cried together. It's my little place where I can go to release my sorrows, celebrate my glories, and revel in just how far I've come. 

Every once in a while, I realize how many people read my blog and I smile to myself. It's another reminder that I'm never alone. I mean, physically. Obviously I'm never alone, I always have my Heavenly Father right there by my side. But it's nice to know that you guys are there. You're interested in my life. My thoughts. My words. You take time out of your day to come here. Which is amazing to me. 

I've broken 1,000 page views. And I just... I marvel at that little number on my computer screen.


It's so weird for me to even think about.

1,000 times someone, somewhere, out there has read my blog, my thoughts, my emotions portrayed in the little characters we call letters. 

So thank you, guys.

Thank you for the small encouragement.

Because the pageviews alone are encouragement enough.

It's nice to know that someone is on the other end. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you. 

Cheers, 
     Reille K. 

stuck. like, in the mud. kind of.

It's the people who sneak up on you that have the biggest clutch on your heart, I think.

In the beginning, you don't see them as a person of huge consequence. But as time goes by, you start to realize just how important to you they have grown to be.

In most cases, you realize this at literally, THE most inopportune moment.

And then you're stuck. You don't know what to say, how to act. You don't know what to do.

You want this person to instantly feel what you've been working up to over a space of time.

And there's not really anything you can do about it.

You're just,

stuck.

this is real life...

Guys. It happened. I bought a car. 


Meet Albus. Isn't he gorgeous?

At first I named HER Florence. 

But then I went on a crazy Etsy splurge (there's a REASON I never go on Esty) and I bought a Deathly Hallows decal and then I was like, what am THINKING?! Of course I'm going to name my car after a Harry Potter character. Of course Albus is the best choice. Of course. 

I bought him on Saturday. From this little place called Granite Peaks Motors on State Street in PG. It was magical, guys. Mike was SO nice (that's the guy I bought my car from). The girls at America First were SO nice (that's where I got my loan from). I just, had the BEST experience. 

I still can't believe he's MINE. All mine. 

He's my baby. 

MY baby. 

Since you guys could be first time car buyers in the future...

5 essential things you need when buying a car:
1- A Co-signer if you are a credit baby and have none.
2- Social Security Card and ID for both yourself and your co-signer.
3- Proof of Income/Proof of Employment. In other words, your last pay check stub (or last two, to be safe.)
4- Your employer's phone number! This one is a little less essential, but still handy. I used mine. 
5- Support System. Bring someone with you. Maybe even have someone who is a third-party outsider with no personal interest in the matter. Have someone mechanically gifted look at the car and drive it a little to make sure it's not halfway broken or anything. 

Really helpful. 

Always nice to have ALL your junk in order. 

I've put this post off for far too long. 

I should have done it the second I got the car. Or at least the day.

But I didn't. 

I've been putting off a lot of writing lately. 

Such as writing to Jordan. Who I really need to write to.

I just... haven't known what to say. 

I don't know how to phrase what I know I want to say.

Anyway. 

There's my big news for now! 

Still can't believe it.

Cheers! 
       Reille K.