Sunday, January 4, 2015

the spark.

I've been thinking a lot lately about New Years and resolutions. And all the hullabaloo surrounding both of those things. I've definitely partaken in the mindset of "New Year, New Me" and made a bunch of resolutions and gotten as far as six months into the year and felt so discouraged and disappointed in myself because I didn't make it the entire year. But this year is a little different. I was looking at my Timehop the other day (a pretty recent addition to my app collection) and I realized how VASTLY different my life and my Self are, in comparison to just one year ago. And how the resolutions that I made at the beginning of the year, which, I honestly have no idea what they even were, may not really have applied to me as my life changed throughout the year. And this New Years, I didn't feel that spark... that resides in that spot between your rib cage and your stomach? Where the exhilarated scream comes from when you ride a really good roller coaster? Or jump off a cliff into the water? That spark of hope, new beginnings, exhilaration, and change... It wasn't there this year. I still haven't found it. It's kind of funny to me that the entire world has the ability to feel this spark all together, once a year, and it's the time of year that majority of people make resolutions and don't keep them. I also think it's funny that people think that the shift from one minute to the next, indicating the new year, is going to make them become this new person that is immediately ABLE to tackle ALL things that they couldn't last year, changing at once all of their innate characteristics. It makes me feel like the spark might be a lie. And also that people are a little kooky. 

Don't get me wrong, resolutions are great, and cheers to you if you actually make them. Because, let's be real, you have to reflect and realize what your weaknesses are, in order to make resolutions. And that in and of itself is a very healthy exercise, in my opinion. Deciding what it is that you need to do to improve those weaknesses, and change them to strengths, make yourself a better you, that is also very healthy, in my opinion. Trying to tackle all of these problems all at the same time and solve every single mystery of why you are the way you are, and do things the way you do them., all at the same time... that feels like it may not be the healthiest choice. In my opinion. ;) It could also be why no one ever keeps their New Years Resolutions. Just a thought. 

My dad and I were discussing resolutions the other day, and he said, "Why are we basing our desire to change and improve on the Roman calendar so much?" And it's totally true! Every day is the start of a new year, if we're going to get a bit philosophical (and I am). Every DAY, every WEEK, every MONTH is a fresh start, a chance to turn over a new leaf. We don't have to wait for New Years to have resolutions to improve ourselves. We can literally start any day and have a chance at a fresh start, a new beginning. Clean slate. Blank canvas.

Along with the timing of resolutions, I also think that a year is a really loooooong time. Like I said before, I bet the resolutions I made at the beginning of last year wouldn't even apply to me anymore. Along with my inability to something every single day for a whole year probably... I think that year long goals (apart from the super general types, like "Be healthier" or "Be more giving", etc.) are just... To big a chunk of time. And also, how daunting?! It freaks people out, I think. And that's part of why we lazy humans have a hard time keeping our New Years resolutions. So here is the solution I came up with for myself...

Try setting goals for a week. Two weeks. A month. Sometimes, you may have the same goal for weeks at a time. But, each week that you accomplish one more week of it, it's not just another tick mark towards your end goal, it's the shiny star sticker at the end! And I don't know about you. But when I accomplish something, it pumps me up! Giving me more energy and motivation for the next goal/project/week. You already have that sense of accomplishment there, so if you mess up one week and fall off the wagon, the whole thing isn't shot. Just the one week. Also, you'll feel better equipped, I think, to tackle the task ahead of you. 

This year, I'm not making a list of resolutions. I'm making a single resolution, kind of, that is really going to be more of a mantra. "Be a better Me." I'm going to try to make weekly goals. And maybe I will have some of the same goals for weeks at a time, maybe they will change every time. But, I feel like I can totally do something really hard for a week. I can probably do it for two. And then 3. And so on and so forth. Also, this way I can see what my life looks like at that moment, and decide if I need to improve in one area over another and really focus in on specific things. Also, I think it will help cultivate that spark of change and hope in me a bit more. And it seems like it will fit me better to be more specific and focused with my goals. And it will be great.

Good luck with all your goals and resolutions, friends!

Reille K. :)

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