I'll be surprised if I can sleep tonight...

Once upon a time, I'm a loser and don't have my own car. Cool story, right?

Well. I've been really good about putting $100-150 in savings from every single paycheck since the second I started working. And here, right now, four months later, I have $1,298.68 saved up. Acceptable down payment in my opinion. 

I searched and searched ksl.com for a car. SEARCHED. And I found one that was amazing and great and not expensive. It was beautiful. I emailed the person and their story was so so sad. I even went so far as to start filling out a loan application at the bank. Yeah, it was serious business. Then, they wanted to do the transaction through ebay and they wanted to ship me the car and it felt like I was being punked. Guess what? I was. Luckily, I backed out before any real stupidity was made. 

So I continued to search ksl.com. And I continued to hate everything. And I continued to want to murder everyone that looked at me. It was a pretty rough week, to say the least. Probably one of the biggest funks I've ever been in. 

Anyway.

I decided that I was done with searching online. It was just frustrating me and I hated it. 

Today my dad came home from work early and we went to lunch and it was delicious (Mama Chu's, it's right at the mouth of the canyon. It looks a tiny bit sketch, but it is literally the most scrumptious Mexican food. And their salsa? Oh my gosh, to die for). Then we made a few stops at Target and the bank. And I mentioned that I wanted to go look at cars tomorrow with my dad. And so we drove down State St. and glanced at the billions of car dealerships on that street. And we found a gem. Wanna see?

It's perfect. It really is. I already have a few names formulating for it. I haven't been inside yet, so I haven't placed whether it's a boy or girl. But. I want it. We're gonna go talk to the dealership tomorrow. I'm so excited that I can barely function over here. I'm so so so so so so so so so SOOOO SOOO ready to have my own car. I will finally feel like a self-sustaining adult. (I know, I know, I'm ridiculous, but it's true). And then I can go visit Clayton when he leaves me and moves all the way to St. George. 

I'm dying. 

It needs to be tomorrow. 

I need everything to work out.

Or I will fall apart. 

Literally. 

Hope with all your hearts for me! (I would say pray, but I don't think this situation calls for that, unless you really want to do that...)

Have a lovely Friday night and a fantastic weekend! 

Cheers, 

       Reille K. 

My apologies, good sir.

I know. 

I've been absent for a while.

Longer than usual.

I have a lot of posts in my brain that I would LOVE to spew out and spin into a lovely tapestry of words but...

My brain feels a little broken these days.

And the words just won't come.

Maybe it's because I may have realized how much I like someone who has been in my life for quite some time and just left for 2 years.

Maybe it's because I realized just how soon my bestie is moving.

Maybe it's because this weekend was the first time I avoided a function because I knew Chelsea was going to be there. And I've been thinking about her a lot lately.

And I hate it.

I think that's probably it. 

I just... wish I didn't know exactly what I would get her for Christmas if we were still friends. Because that makes me sad.

I mean, I did the right thing... didn't I?

I did what was best for me... right?

I hate it. I hate losing people (whether by my choice or theirs... usually theirs). 

Oh well. I'm just depressing myself now. So I need to be done with this. 

I'll get back into blogging. And not being depressing. I will. Promise. 

But for now...

Cheers, 
      Reille K. 

Bits and Pieces.

I have a lot to say, but nothing is big enough for it's own post... so here we go! 

- I just want my own freaking car already. I'm ready for it. I can't wait for it. I'm so done with not being self-sufficient in that way. It's really annoying that when I have a day off, I can't go anywhere unless it's within walking distance (but let's be real, I'm MUCH too lazy for all that business). I hate that I can't drive myself to doctor's appointments or get my haircut or go get milk to make mac and cheese if I so desire. Anyway... 

- I need to move to England, so I can eat Nando's and Nando's only, because apparently that's what they do over there. I have a few English YouTubers that I love and follow on twitter and instagram and I swear they eat at Nando's like, once a day. I'm serious. I just want to know what it tastes like! 

- I just need to visit England for like, two months, at least. So I can find me a british husband and go see everything on the entire (kind of big) island. And feel like I've lived there, but still be able to give blood in the United States. I mean, technically I could live there for five years and still be able to, but... we'll see. 

- Grape Jelly on wheat bread is surprisingly delicious. 

- Went to Yogurtland yesterday... felt super festive and got egg nog froyo. Gross. It tastes like bubblegum, which I haven't liked since I was a wee little lass. My dislike for egg nog has finally been explained! 

- I'm still contemplating a haircut. I'll probably do it and regret it for about a month. Then get over myself for a while and be fine with it. Then hate myself for doing it again... making it a really long, really vicious cycle. 

- I have officially been off soda for over a month. To the point that it makes me sick if I drink it. Yaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!! It's a miracle, guys. Really. I used to drink a mountain dew almost every single day. 

- I made  chocolate frogs tonight with my sister. And they are MAGICAL!!! Seriously. I feel really cool. Long live Harry Potter! I love Harry Potter so so so much. I really do. 

I think that's most of what I wanted to say. I feel like there was probably more... but that's all I got for now. Wooooo...

A tribute of sorts, I suppose.

Hey!

I wasn't planning on including this in my post for today, but Carlee wrote or quoted or whatever something really really great. Which you can find here. Go read it. I very much enjoyed it.

Back to my original purpose.

Today in church, I was one of "those people who cry".

Here's how it started. There was a baby blessing. Not just any old baby in the ward, but my favorite young women's leader's baby. That little baby is absolutely adorable, her name is Raemee and her older sister Addie is my bestie in Nursery. She likes me best and I like her best. Anyway. The second Shawn (the little girls' dad and Kim's husband) started blessing little Rae, I could barely contain myself. I was filled with the Spirit and I was really happy for them. I started thinking about how amazing it is that the men of this church have the priesthood. I thought about Shawn in particular though. Over the time that I've known the Stinson's, I've noticed a few things about him. I see how much he loves his wife. I see how much he loves his daughters. I love their relationship. I see that in everything he does, he honors his priesthood. And I want my {someday} husband to be just like him. I don't know if that sounds weird, but it's true. I just love seeing people who are AMAZING examples of this gospel, and the Stinson's are definitely those people to me.

Anyway, I teared up during that, then once the organist started playing the Sacrament hymn, I shed real, hot tears. It was hymn 194- There is a Green Hill Far Away. Which has always been one of my favorites. It was sung at my grandpa's funeral, which happened when I was four years old. But I still remember it to this day. All of my older girl cousins sang it. But, I could barely contain myself. I mean, it wasn't like I was sobbing, but I definitely had no mascara left after that. I've just had a really rough week. And I felt so much love from my Heavenly Father today and I am just so darn grateful. I really needed it today.

I'm so so grateful for this Gospel in my life. I would be completely lost without it. And I'd definitely be a crabby old hermit. That's for sure.

Favorite humans. (British Edition)

I'll be honest here, I love love love Great Britain. And the people in it? I like them too. I've always dreamed of living there, and this past summer, that dream intensified. Probably because I realized there was no reason that I COULDN'T just up and move to England... beside my point, moving on! Humans of Britain.

Side note: I've become really into the whole youtube video watching lately and so most of these humans are from youtube. You'll have to just get over it. 

My newest favorites:  
Jack and Finn Harries.

This is Finn.

This is Jack.       

They're twins. :)

Aren't they just so cute?!

Jack is a YouTuber. His channel is JacksGap (you should really check it out), and sometimes he brings in Finny for some videos. I recognize that I partially enjoy them so much simply because they're British. But they are also really funny. And I don't know quite what it is about them, but I get SUCKED in to their videos. Go check them out. They're great. 

An old favorite:

Emma Watson.

She is just so darn pretty.

This picture is pre-post-Harry Potter-haircut. Which, I also loved. Her hair just looks really soft and fluffy right here, and I want my hair to look like this. All the time. She is an AMAZING actress. Have you seen her in her new movie? The Perks of being a Wallflower? Because if you haven't, you should. Make it happen people. She is so great! And she is also just a really amazing human. She came to America to go to Brown. By herself. Uhh, bravery. And intelligence (because Brown is crazy, and an Ivy League, and just, real hard to get into). She's just... fantastic. 

The obvious:

One Direction (I recognize that Niall is NOT British, he is Irish. But, he's an honorary Brit. He's won a Brit award and he hangs out with British people a lot.)

Ahhhh, so attractive and great!

Not only are they attractive, but they are great singers and they have fantastic personalities. I mean, watch some interviews. They are hilarious! And I love that they are still fine with being super dorky even though they're super famous world-wide and blah blah blah. They're great.

Other YouTubers I quite like:

Alfie from PointlessBlog

I think he's actually really funny. He seem so real and junk, even though it's youtube. Plus, he does the most random things in his videos, which greatly appeals to me. 

Marcus Butler from MarcusButlerTv

"Helloooooooooooooo". He's funny too. Let's be real. All my favorite YouTuber's that are British are all friends in real life. And I'm super jealous. But I like the things he talks about. And I like that he's such a dork a lot of the time. 


I can't remember if I've missed anyone. If I did... I'll make a second edition of my favorite british humans. 

Go check them out. You won't regret it. You might, but only because you'll get sucked into youtube for three hours and have wasted SO much time on it. But entertainment wise... you won't. 

Grunky and Tired.

Very very very first. Shout out to my newest follower, Tailor. Hey girl, heeeeeyyyyyy. :) I'm glad you enjoy my blog. It really means a lot. 

Very very second. Shout out to all my old followers. Thanks for stickin' around. I know sometimes I write about, literally, the DUMBEST things. But every once in a while, I strike on a little gem of a post. 

Very third. Let's be real. Thanks to ANYONE who reads my blog. Thanks for taking time out of your day to read my little ramblings. Thanks for caring enough to click on the link, or type in the URL or however the heck you get here, thanks. 

Shall we get on with it? I think we shall. 

Once upon a time, I've been in a SLUMP. I've been grunky (yes, grunky) and tired for what feels like the past month. And I'm SICK OF IT. I'm incredibly annoyed tonight. 

I'm annoyed because I *thought* I found an awesome deal on a car, that turned out to be a scam. I was rearin' and ready to go, and then it just didn't pan out and was all weird and junk. Long story short, I'm still searchin'. And I'm sick of reading all the stupid ads on ksl. I just want a car already!!! *eye roll*

I'm annoyed because I haven't been performing to my best ability at work. And other people are starting to notice. And I hate it. I feel awful. I just... HATE it. 

I'm annoyed that I'm not being very nice to my family. I hate hate hate when I get like this. All grumpy and ridiculous. Where the tiniest little thing will set me off or I just can't seem to respond to anything in a tone other than "super pissed". It makes me CRAZY. 

I'm annoyed that I always feel tired. It's my least favorite of all the feelings.

I'm annoyed that I'm annoyed with all these things. For a while there, I wouldn't let anything get me down, and it was AWESOME. I don't know what changed, but something must have. And I can't figure it out. 

I'm just ready for this business of grunky and tired to be done. 

I'm ready to go back to being super duper happy and content with life. 

I'm ready to be done with the turmoil. Because turmoil SUCKS. 

Sorry this post ended up being kinda lame. 

But... it had to happen. 

Anyway...

Cheers, 

     Reille K. 

P.S. I sincerely hope your friday night was infinitely better than mine. 

Wait... what?

Once upon a time, Meg and I went to Target after going to dinner at Kneader's to avoid the home teachers... (shhhhh, don't tell.) And we were there for a thousand years, I spent money on things I didn't need... not right then, at least. And then we got in the car and started driving home. Meg's gas light came on and when she was pulling into the gas station, (we were talking about this kid from work, by the way) these words came out of my mouth, "We should just go back and I could ask him out on a date, right now." What possessed me to say that, I don't know. But! Meg took it and ran with it. She was like, "Yep, it's happening. I'm not taking you home until you ask him on a date." Crap. I felt like I was going to THROW UP (which I couldn't stop saying). But, in a good way. Like, I was so excited and nervous that I just wouldn't be able to hold it in... that sounds really weird, get over it. So we drove back to Target. I had to FORCE myself to get out of the car. He wasn't where I thought he was going to be, so I lost my nerve... Then I was like, well obviously he's going to be in the break room. Duh. I walked in there and basically all the girls from Softlines were in there. No boy. *Whew!* They asked why I was back and I told them. And then that particular boy walked in and they all giggled and I died. And then he went and sat across the room and I couldn't do it with all of them sitting there! So I stood there, talking to them in hushed tones and not being able to do it. And not being able to do it. And then, once all of them left, I just did it. I went over and sat at the table with him. And I just. DID IT. I asked him on a date. I had a bit of word vomit, and don't remember a lot of what I said. But, we decided that the next night (which was last night) would work for both of us. And we exchanged numbers, and I was really awkward. And dorky. And then I left and junk and couldn't make my cheeks turn normal red instead of crazy embarrassed red for the rest of the night.

I DID IT. I ASKED A BOY OUT IN PERSON.

I sat around most of the day yesterday, besides going to lunch with my Grandma and going to Walmart with my mom (which, by the way, I felt like a traitor and I just... couldn't stand it). And then I picked him up from work and we went on our date. I'm not going to go into a lot of detail for this part, simply because... I'm not like that. It was really great. And I had a really amazing time, even though I felt like a really big dork for like 90% of the night. We went to Red Robin and watched The Hunger Games at his house. And I met his sister and two of her chilluns. And it was fantastic.

He doesn't read a lot, like me. Which is fine. But, I plan on getting him hooked. I've already started a list. And we're going to have a movie list too. And I'm really excited to have a new friend. It's been such a long time since I've gotten to know someone new more by choice than anything else... if that makes sense. Anyway...

Cheers!
      Reille K.

"We shouldn't be allowed in public."

That's me and my bestie last Monday night. We should NOT have been allowed out in public. Except, that we had an incredible adventure that I wouldn't trade for the world. Let's rewind back to September...

I bought shark footies. For a footie pajama party where there would be hot-tubbing and footie pajamas. I was really excited because I hadn't seen or been with these humans since graduation, and I missed them, even if I hated that I did. But, I was mostly excited that I had a pair of footies. And that they were SHARKS. Because we all know that I LOOOOOVE sharks. After that night, I never wore them again...

Then, last Saturday, I was just minding my own business at work when my bestie, Clayton, tried to scare me and I caught him. We talked for a few minutes, then he noticed the footies behind me and he said that the ones in boys were too small for him. (When he was trying to find me, he asked the opinion of my Team Lead on if they would fit him. He's MUCH too tall for that business.) He tried those on anyway. They didn't work out. Then, I was like, Clayton, try on the shark ones! Duhhhh. So he did. They fit him. He loved them. And then he bought them. 

Monday night, Clayton came over to my house after work clad in his footies and the quilt (the giant quilt) I made him for Christmas last year. Which was the perfect touch, by the way. And we sat there for a few minutes with my mom and grandma watching the last of the show my mom was watching on DIY (my mother and her DIY...). Then we did this: 

And obviously I have the worst balance of anyone in the world, and Clayton has really good balance. After the pictures and deciding which photogrid and insta filter to use and uploading and all that junk, we started Percy Jackson. Ohh, we love that movie. Do you realize how famous all those humans are? Because we did last night. And we both really really love Logan Lerman. Then we ate some mints from Sonic that my dad had brought home and we decided that we wanted tots from Sonic... so we got in the car and had the idea to go somewhere that we had to go INTO for food. So to Denny's we went. From the second we got out of the car, people were laughing at us and we definitely got noticed. Our waitress, or simply just "tress", loved us a lot. And we invited her to our friendship. She started out with asking if we wanted, "Hot Chocolate, Strawberry Lemonade... or some Milk?" Then the whole night consisted of us being really weird. And laughing A LOT (let's be real, when are Clayton and I NOT laughing a lot?) And people staring at us from across the restaurant. And eating a sandwich that was literally as big as I could open my mouth. And needing a GALLON of ranch (Denny's has really good ranch, by the way)... (And DELICIOUS seasoned fries). They also have Hobbit food. In case you were wondering. 

But really. It was just great. We went back to my house and watched the rest of Percy Jackson, where I ended up on the floor, like I always do. And forcing Fritz to cuddle with Clayton. And just, an all around good time. And at the end of that night, I realized something. I have the best best friend a human could ever ask for. It'll be a really sad day when he moves to St. George at the beginning of the year. But that's okay, because it means that I get to come visit him! 

Cheers, 

        Reille K. 

All in good time.

Everything will happen eventually. All in good time. With some things, I'm perfectly content to wait patiently for it to happen to me. With others, I yearn each and every day for them to happen. Right now. I can't wait a second longer. 

Unfortunately for me, the things I could wait for, are working themselves out much faster than the things I can't wait for. And while it's slightly annoying, maybe it's for the best. Maybe, for some reason, I'm not quite ready. Who knows? Only God, these days. Since I have no idea. 

Things that are working out? I really know what I'm going to school for. I know what you're thinking, "I thought you already knew what you wanted to do with yourself and go to school for and do with your degree and blah blah blah." Well. I did. And don't get me wrong here, I still LOVE psychology. I still plan on keeping it part of my life. But, my new plan? It's much better. It will challenge me in ways I never thought I would let myself be challenged. And I know I'll have an aptitude for it. I know I'll be great at it. I'll definitely have to practice practice practice. Are you so ready for me to finally tell you what it is? 

*drum roll please...*

Phlebotomy Technician. That's right, I'm going to become a medical vampire of sorts, as my mom has always loved calling it. But let's be real. I absolutely hate that she refers to phlebotomy and vampires in the same sentence. Beside the point... I'm really excited. Here's how it went down.

I walked to the Stake Blood Drive yesterday afternoon, in the foot-ish of snow. Luckily it's always at my building, which is only about a block away. And I went through all the little steps and such, and they all commented on how "fast my flow" was (as always). Then, the girl who was finishing me up... we were talking about my rain boots... and somehow I mentioned that I absolutely love giving blood. Like, it's literally one of my absolute favorite things to do. And she was like, "Oh my gosh, me too! That's how I started out, and I realized that it was super easy to become a phlebotomist. You should totally do it!" And I pondered on that a bit as I meandered on home. I paused to jump in a slushy puddle of melted snow because the girl convinced me that I had to be sure my boots were puddle jumping safe (they are). And I realized that I could totally do it. Even though the thought of sticking needles into people kinda, really, super freaks me out... I could get used to it. And then, think of how many lives I would be helping to save?! Mind-boggling. 

Bonus? The course costs a whopping total of $528 including the test. It takes 5 weeks total. 3 hours a day. Monday-Thursday. Also, Meg is going to do it with me! Ahhhhhh! Perfection. We can learn together, study together, and practice on each other! I'm super excited, guys. SUPER. EXCITED. Meg thinks that I'll meet my future husband during the course. Maybe. We'll see. Also, we're both super excited to basically be living in our own real life Grey's Anatomy. No, it won't be exactly like the real thing. We realize that. But, if we end up working at a hospital? It'll be pretty close. Close enough to count. :) 

June 3. As content as I am with where I'm at right now, it can't come fast enough. I'm so ready for this. Is it sad that I want to buy a text book or something of that sort so I can start learning it all now? I won't, but that doesn't mean I haven't thought about it. 

Cheers, 
       Reille K. 

Stop breaking my heart...

This song sums up the general feeling. The feeling I had when I first... discovered a certain human of the male variety. As I started to get to know him (mostly from my facebook stalking escapades with a hint of pinterest), I found that he basically fit the mold of the guy I always imagined myself with. I also found that he was already spoken for, in a way. And, at first, I was completely ready to worm my way in there and knock her out of the running. But... lately, I don't know. One of my absolute heroes wrote a blog post a couple days ago (maybe it was only yesterday?) about dating and such (that you can find here.) that was an answer to an unspoken prayer. Granted, not the whole thing, but a few paragraphs and lines... they got me. They got me good. And here they are (I give FULL credit to Tiff, by the way. And I'll italicize all of Tiff's words so you can tell what's her and what's me).

(Context if you didn't go read the entire post: She was having a conversation with a guy at her singles ward family night about his friend and another girl across the room)

"Why is it, that as young single adults, we feel a certain right, a right that we don't have, to claim hold on strangers. To 'Call dibs', in a sense. He went on to say, "Well, they've been talking for a bit now… and he really likes her. He doesn't expect a relationship immediately…" and I said, "but how do you even know that she wants to date right now? How do you know that she's interested in dating? He has no right to expect even that of her so soon. Tell him to be her friend. A true friend first. Then, perhaps, if they both want more to come of it, that can take place when they are both ready.”

She got me there. It was like she was talking to me directly, about that certain human of the male variety. I really had no right to be so bold in my thoughts and think that I could and SHOULD steal him away. I mean, honestly, we've hung out a grand total of one time. It went well, but wasn't anything absolutely spectacular. 

The one who is hard to get is not the one you should pursue.

I know it's not always like the movies and books, but I feel like it should be a little easier. And I don't want to be that girl. The one that ruins the other girls plans. If it ends up that way, then fine. But to actively set out to do that, I don't want to be her.

"Don't chase people. Be you, do your own thing, and work hard. The right people who belong in your life will come to you, and stay."

This is a quote that Tiff found. LOVE IT. Completely perfect for my situation.

I just have to be patient.

Things will all work out.

I'll meet him someday.

But for now, I'll just try to be friends with that certain human of the male variety. 

No matter how hard it may sometimes feel.

I just don't want to break my own heart anymore. It hurts more than if someone else does most of the time. 

Anyway...

Cheers, 

Reille K. 

Gratitude, Sentiments, and Junk (part three)

Okay. This is it. This is the last of my 30 things I'm grateful for. I hope you've read the others. If not they are here and here. This process has made me realize just how blessed I am. And I really am grateful for all these things. Anyway. Here are the last ten. 

21- Music. It can create so many emotions, calm them, intensify them. It can say the words I can't bring myself to. It sometimes puts my own emotions into words in a much more beautiful way than I myself ever could. Sometimes it puts emotions I didn't even know I had into words. I just LOVE music. 

22- Silence. I may be grateful for music, but I'm also grateful for silence. Sometimes, you just need to chill, and turn EVERYTHING off. It's amazing just how much you can hear when everything is silent. 

23- My bathtub. I literally take a bath every night. It's so relaxing. I sit in the tub and read, usually. On the off chance that I'm not reading something, I sit there and talk to myself. Don't judge. You all know you talk to yourself too. You have imaginary conversations with people and say the things you could never say to their face so you can get it off your chest. Or you rehearse a conversation that you are trying to get the nerve to have. Or you're daydreaming about a conversation you really want to have but doubt will ever happen. 

24- Toothbrushes/toothpaste. I can't STAND the feeling of fuzzy, plaque-y teeth. I probably brush more than the average human should some days. It drives me absolutely insane. 

25-America. Let's be real here, guys. Just because Obama was re-elected, does NOT mean that the second coming is going to happen RIGHT NOW. And Obama is not a communist. Stop it. You're being ridiculous. We are not a nation of Democrats and Republicans. We are a nation of AMERICANS. Just be happy that we're free. Take an hour and research a country or two, maybe watch the movie "Invisible Children", and get over yourself. Our lives are pretty plush, even when they suck. Give Barack a break! How about you be President? I can't imagine it being the easiest job. So relax. In a week you won't even care anymore. ...Sorry about that little rant there... but I really am grateful to live in America. I know I talk about leaving to England or somewhere around there (as in Scotland, Wales, Ireland [probably not so much Ireland...]) just because those places absolutely fascinate me, and I really like the idea of going back to my roots and the incredible adventure that would be. But really. America is great. I am definitely PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN. Word. 

26- The troops. They are INCREDIBLE. The sacrifices they make are insane. My brother-in-law is in the military and has been deployed... twice? Thrice? in the seven years he's been married to my sister. And I have seen first hand, not only my sister, but other military spouses, and they are some of the strongest people ever. I just... I don't think I could ever do it. All forms of military, whether it be the actual Soldiers, their spouse, their children, their parents, siblings; All of them, AMAZING. And I'm so grateful for all of their sacrifices to keep our country free. 

27- Nature. It's so beautiful! Even when it's snowy and gross (mostly because I just hate the snow, ironic, right?) it glitters and feels so clean. It's all self-sustaining. Nature knows what's up, if you really think about all the little bits and pieces of that puzzle. Just... amazing. Grateul. 

28- A place to call home. There are a lot of people who don't have a home, don't feel like they belong there, have a "bad home life", etc. And I've never had that. I'm so grateful that my home has always been a little haven, especially my bedroom. After a long day, it's good to come home and feel that weight just immediately lift. Simply because you're at home. And coming home after you haven't been there for a while? Ahhhh. One of the greatest feelings ever. 

29- My bed. 'Nuff said. 

30- My ability to create. Now, I can't draw worth peanuts. But crafy type things? Ceramics (most of the time... heh...)? I can do that business. And lately I've been super into mosaics. Those? I can do those. I love that I have a creative outlet that I can let all those emotions out into the world through. And I suppose, now that I think of it, blogging is creating as well. This kind of goes hand in hand with being grateful for art. I love that I can participate in creation, which is so much bigger than just myself. 

There you have it! Something for every day of November. I hope you've enjoyed and maybe been reminded of some things that you yourself are grateful for. Like I've said before, tell me what you're grateful for. I loooooove hearing from you guys! Have a wonderful day! 

Cheers, 
     Reille K. 

Gratitude, Sentiments, and Junk. (part dos)

The second installment of my gratitude posts. I'll be honest, it's coming a lot faster than I expected. It was harder than I thought to think of the first ten. I got to about six and then had to sit there and think, really hard, for quite some time. But once I started thinking about the next ten, I got on a roll and I'm already halfway through the next post! Once you make the effort to recognize your blessings, it's amazing what you'll see. 

11- The Shineys. Now, most of you will have no idea what, or rather, who the Shineys are. It's an all girl group on facebook. A place where you can go to share your sorrows, triumphs, and inspriations, and know that there are 1,101 other girls out there to love and support you. Be excited with you. Be sad with you. Pray for you. And even though I don't go on there ALL the time, and I'm sure it's not nearly as big a part of my life as some of the others, I'm still grateful for it. Because when I DO go on there, I always find something that tugs my heartstrings or makes me smile. Something that reminds me that I'M NOT ALONE. Love those girls. 

12- Literature/Books. I LOOOOOVE to read. Anything and everything (for the most part). I love that I can sit down and read a book and be transported into a different world, different time, different perspective. I love all the knowledge that people have been kind enough to write down for the future generations. I love all of it. Even if I hate it. Because somewhere, someone, loves it. They love it in the same way that I love the literature and books that I love. I have a few books that I love so much, that I've read and re-read them over 20 times. Okay, really, only one book. I've realized lately, that it's truly my favorite book. I've never claimed to have a favorite book because I always felt like I loved too many books. But, I always end up coming back to this book. And I love it every single time, even though I know exactly what's coming. Because what I'm going through each time I read it is different and I take away something different. I just rambled a little bit, but there you go! I'm grateful for literature. 

13- My followers on the blog, and Instagram. As little as it is, I'm grateful when people like the things I post. I'm grateful that for those few minutes or seconds, I've been able to be part of their day, and hopefully bring a smile to their face. I'm grateful that they took the time to listen to me. I'm grateful because when I see the list of people who liked my picture on Instagram, I don't feel as alone in the world. 

14- Other bloggers. They teach me, inspire me, relate to me. I love being able to connect to people through the internet and I love that we all encourage each other to be our best. I love reading other blogs and seeing that I can do something really small for someone else and it can change their entire day. 

15-All the girls I work with. Regardless of if I like them personally, I get to learn something different from each of them. There are a few where I simply learn patience. Lots of it. Because they are just so darn ridiculous. But, I'm grateful for them. 

16- My past. All the humans I've ever known, all the things I've gone through, all the places I've been, words I've said-- that's what makes me, me. If one tiny, seemingly insignificant thing changed, I could theoretically be a COMPLETELY different person. And I like who I've become. I'm grateful for every crappy day I've had, every crappy thing that's been said to me. Because they've made me stronger. 

17- Lotions, chaptsticks, etc. Moisturizing products. Dry skin of any sort is AWFUL. ITCHY. PAINFUL. Chapped lips? I avoid them like the plague. Hence the Blistex Medicated Mint that is almost permanently attached to my pockets (or cleavage on the occasion that I don't have any pockets, one of the ONLY benefits of being busty). Dry skin is pretty much my mortal enemy. I hate it. 

18- My British YouTube friends... who don't know I exist. I just love them. You should really get to know them. I can't remember who introduced me to DailyGrace, but they opened a can of worms. She is my favorite American YouTuber, and watching her every day lead me to fall in love with Jack from JacksGap, Alfie from PointlessBlog, Marcus from MarcusButlerTV, and Caspar Lee from dicasp. I love all of them and I just label them all as "British" because majority of them are. But, I love them. They are fantastic. You should check ALL of them out. And Subscribe to their channels. And just, love them. 

19- A couple specific teachers. Namely, Mrs. Crampton and Mr. Barth. They made such an impact on my life my senior year. They brought out the best in me, always. And definitely helped me become the person I am today. I absolutely love them. I have a constant reminder of what Mrs. Crampton did for me hung in my room, my mosaic. It was a BEAST. But I did it. I completed it. And it was showcased in the senior art show. It's a physical reminder that even if I personally don't think that what I do is all that spectacular, other people can see it. And react accordingly. And Mr. Barth? He's probably one of the only teachers that I am ACTUALLY friends with. Not in a weird way, though. It's hard to explain. 

20- Periods. Yeah, they hurt like HELL most of the time. Like, a million daggers coming from all sides down there. But, they are wonderful. Period=Fertility. It means you can make babies. You can create a tiny little human. You're healthy. It's the best pain there is. And I've come to realize that it's more of a blessing than most people will ever realize in their lifetime. I know this is a weird thing to be grateful for, but I am. This may not be said ever again, but I AM GRATEFUL FOR PERIODS. Also, sidenote that is related. If you're a woman, and you have a smart phone- GET A PERIOD TRACKER APP and USE IT. Know what's happening in your body. Know your cycle. Please. Please. Please! You'll thank me one day. The apps are free. But their purpose and usefulness is priceless. 

Just in case you missed the first ten, those are here.

There you have it. 10 more things I'm grateful for. Once again, let me know what you're grateful for. I love seeing what makes others tick. It's eye-opening most of the time. Anyway, I hope you have a wonderful Wednesday! 

Cheers, 

       Reille K. 

Gratitude, Sentiments, and Junk. (Part one)

Alright. Everyone and their dog has been posting on facebook and instagram and blogging about something each day that they are grateful for. But, let's be real. That is a lot of work for me. I know, I'm ridiculous. I also really want to be that kind of person, but it's just... too much. I also feel like I would be incredibly ungrateful... can I call myself an Ingrate? Is that a thing? (it is, I checked.) if I didn't talk about what I'm grateful for and do it just as much as everyone else. So! Brilliant idea--I'm going to do three posts, because one is really hard and would be insanely long. With 10 things I'm grateful for each. 30 total. One for each day of this month. And I feel like I can ramble a bit about each thing on here, so it's even MORE special and sentimental and junk like that. So, here goes.

I'm grateful for...

1- My family. Oh my gracious, they are absolutely fantastic. I absolutely LOVE them. Each and every one of them. My parents are so great and support me in pretty much anything I want to do. And they drive me around and let me borrow their cars all the time since I'm a loser and still don't have my own vehicle (I'm getting close though, no worries). My siblings are always there for me, and probably know me the best. Out of anyone in the world. And I can't even imagine life without them. I'm so glad we have the opportunity to spend eternity together. I just... I love them so much and am so grateful that I was placed with them in this life. I can barely even find the words to describe it. That's how grateful I am.

2- Clayton. This kid is my absolute best friend. I can literally tell him anything in the world and he won't disown me or anything. I love him to death, and I'm going to miss him SO much if/when he moves to St. George at the beginning of the year. Seriously. The second I get my own car, I'm planning a road trip to visit him. Already. I just... can't even believe that I am so blessed with a bestie as great as him. As weird as this sounds, I'm really glad I was a super weird germaphobe (is there even a correct way to spell that?!) sophomore year and that he got swine flu during the crazy paranoid time, and I turned around and threatened his life if he gave it to me. I think I'm most myself with him (outside my family, obviously), and we're sometimes almost the same person. I can tell what he's saying when he doesn't even use real words. I... am so grateful for him. So so grateful.

3- The gospel. Holy buckets. The restored gospel of Christ is literally the best. I can't even imagine where I would be in life without it (actually, I can. And I hate that person. A lot. She really sucks... anyway...). It has helped me infinitely. I would actually be miserable without it. I went through a really rough time... the summer after my junior year of high school. I still went to church and all, but my personal habits were dismal. And I was MISERABLE. I actually didn't fully resolve it all until Easter Sunday of this year (which was actually perfect, as that day is all about The Atonement, I'll get into it a bit more in a minute.) But, if I weren't able to have the knowledge that this gospel has given me? I don't think I could live my life. I wouldn't know about eternal families.  Or priesthood power. Or The Atonement. Or temple ordinances. Or... true, pure happiness. To be perfectly honest.  It is literally my lifeline. My anchor. I know I'm not always the perfect example. I know I sometimes (or most times, since I'm being honest) don't read my scriptures every day. And I know I don't pray as much as I should. But that doesn't mean I believe it any less. I feel like, I almost always have a prayer in my heart. And I know that my Heavenly Father loves me. And I know that this gospel is true. With all my heart. I know it. And I'm so grateful.

4- The Atonement. Keeping on with my little spiritual theme for a moment... I never really knew what it was like to repent. Not really. I knew there were... steps, if you will. We all learn them in Primary, Sunday School, and Young Womens. I think they might be... Recognize, Forgive yourself, Settle it with other people should they be involved, Pray and Repent to your Heavenly Father, and then Speak to proper Priesthood authority if necessary. Or something of the sort. Honestly? I never really paid much attention during those lessons, because I never thought I would really need it. But then, I made a HUGE mistake. I won't go into it, but I was miserable. I hated myself. And I knew that I was sinning. But did that make me stop? No. The expression "Curiosity killed the cat" comes to mind when I think back to that time of my life. Anyway, I began praying. And I tried so hard to occupy myself with other things at all times and avoid my... triggers, if you will, like the plague. And I was finally able to  stop, with a lot of prayer and hard work. But I knew I wasn't done. The second I said something to my bishop, and he teared up and told me that Heavenly Father forgave me. I literally felt it. I finally felt that peace that I had always heard about. I finally felt the weight lift. And my heart expand with His love, and pride in me that I had finally done that. I let out a contented sigh, and I finally knew what my P. blessing was talking about when it said I would take the sacrament with great love, or something like that. And it was very fitting, being Easter Sunday. I was actually there for my seminary worthiness interview. Woo! I was really worthy then. And it felt awesome. Since then, I'll admit, I've slipped a few times. But, I've always gotten right back on the wagon. And I know I'm okay. I know that The Atonement is working in my life every single day. And I don't know what I would do if I wasn't able to repent of my sins. And wasn't able to be cleansed of them.

5- My job. Yes, I'm grateful to work at Target. I feel like it gives me purpose, even if it's a slightly ridiculous purpose. It is literally just a whole bunch of service. My job is to serve. I give service to the people I work with. The people I work for. The people who shop at Target. The people who ask me questions, for advice on what to wear, if things go together well, etc. I know it's a little weird, but I actually really like working there. Even if I sometimes complain about it a lot. It's just because I'm inherently lazy, or I mostly feel like I am. It makes me feel weird when my leadership tells me that they see a lot of potential in me. Simply because I feel like I'm just doing my job, not anything really noteworthy. But I suppose they see it differently.

6- Lexis. This girl. She came into my life at a time where I was starting to feel... a little lonely and lost. And I  felt like I had a single friend (Clayton). She has become my work bestie. And she has been such a blessing. It helps me look forward to work when I know that we'll have even part of a shift together. I can talk to her about boys, and I don't feel like a super dork. We both are driven crazy by the same things and people. I'm just, incredibly grateful that by some miracle, she's in my life.

7- The Internet. I know, so cliche! But for reals, one morning our internet was down and my phone network wasn't really working and I felt SO LOST. I couldn't facebook or blog about my frustrations with having no internet. I couldn't drown my sorrows in a few episodes of some foreign tv show on Netflix. I couldn't listen to music on Pandora. Or check Instagram. Or watch DailyGrace on YouTube. It was absolutely PATHETIC. So, instead of coping with the problem like a normal human, what did I do? I went back to bed. And took a morning nap before work. Plus, I love connecting with people over the internet. I wouldn't be able to do this post without the internet. I wouldn't know any of you lovelies as well. I wouldn't be absolutely in love with a handful of British YouTubers, and hope that someday when I visit/move to England I can meet one of them in a coffee shop and we can instantly click and fall in love and then get married. The internet also supplies a lot of characters for my daydreams. Sometimes they have characters from real life in them... but still. We wouldn't have iTunes without the internet! Just think of it. We would ALL live in really small bubbles if we didn't have the internet.

8- Art. Ohhhhh, art. It makes the world a much more beautiful place to be. And brings so much joy. It also brings people together. Which I love. Two completely different people, leading different lives, with completely different lifestyles can be brought together by a single piece that they both like. It's amazing. I just... I'm grateful that there are people out there that are comfortable putting little pieces of themselves out into the world for us to enjoy.

9- My puppies. They aren't really puppies anymore. But I will call them that until the day they die. They're my cuddle buddies. They comfort me when I'm sad. And jump up and down with me when I'm happy. And curl up next to me when I sleep, letting me know that I'm not alone. They're always there to talk to. And they're just so darn adorable! Even when they whine all throughout dinner. Or poop in the hall. Or bark incessantly, really loud when they want a bone or to go outside. Or scratch at your door to get out in the mornings so it squeaks. I love 'em.

10- My Grandma. She is incredible. She is always doing things for other people. And she drives me to work ALL the time. And we go to lunch together a lot. And she's stubborn. And opinionated. And so amazing. She is so determined to get a Temple quilt done for each grandkid. Which, she is a phenomenal quilter. She has hand-quilted countless quilts. For a slew of people. She is insanely talented. She can sew just about anything. I love her so much.


There it is. The first 10 things that I'm grateful for. I hope you enjoyed. I hope it was all you were dreaming it would be and more. I hope I made you cry with how beautiful my sentiments were (I joke). Tell me what you're grateful for. :) Until next time...

Cheers,
      Reille K.